控える
hikaeruto refrain from doing something; to abstain from; to hold back
食べ過ぎを控えましょう。
Let's refrain from eating too much.
彼は発言を控えた。
He refrained from making a comment.
Often used in health, diet, or social contexts to indicate moderation or avoidance.
to keep oneself in check; to restrain oneself
感情を控えるべきだ。
You should restrain your emotions.
Used when moderating one's behavior or reactions.
to be reserved or restrained in speech or action
彼女は控えめな態度を取った。
She adopted a reserved attitude.
Often describes someone who is modest or unassuming.
to keep a record or make a note of something
予定を控える
to keep a note of one's schedule
Less common but still used in formal or administrative contexts.
to wait or stay in reserve (e.g., for backup or support)
控えの選手
a reserve player
Used in sports or organizational contexts.
Related Phrases
💡Pro Tip
Polite Requests with 控える
Use 控えてください (hikaete kudasai) to politely ask someone to refrain from an action. For example: '大声で話さないでください' (Please don't speak loudly) can be softened to '大声で話すのを控えてください' (Please refrain from speaking loudly).
⚡Gold Rule
When to Use 控える
Use 控える when you want to emphasize self-restraint or moderation. It is not used for external restrictions (e.g., '禁止する' for prohibitions).
📖Word Origin
From the verb 控 (hikae, 'to restrain, hold back') + える (auxiliary verb indicating potential or ability). The kanji 控 originally meant 'to pull back' or 'to restrain,' and the verb form 控える evolved to mean 'to refrain from' or 'to keep in check.'
📝Usage Notes
控える is a versatile verb often used in formal or polite contexts. It implies a conscious effort to avoid or limit something, whether it's actions, speech, or habits. In polite speech, it can soften requests or suggestions (e.g., '控えていただけますか' = 'Could you refrain from...?').