Saying "Please" in Vietnamese: A Beginner’s Guide

In Vietnamese culture, politeness is deeply tied to hierarchy, respect, and social harmony. The word "please" is not used as freely as in English—instead, Vietnamese relies on context, tone, and relationship levels to soften requests. For beginners, the most important rule is: always pair your request with the appropriate honorific or polite phrase to avoid sounding abrupt or rude. Age, status, and familiarity all influence how you should phrase a request.

When to Use Each Variant

1. làm ơn (to strangers, service staff, or in formal settings)

This is the most common way to say "please" when making a polite request to someone you don’t know well or in a service context (e.g., shops, restaurants). It softens the request and shows respect.

• làm ơn
  • - Làm ơn cho tôi xem cái này. "Please let me see this."
  • - Làm ơn đợi một chút. "Please wait a moment."
  • - Làm ơn giúp tôi một tay. "Please give me a hand."

2. xin (to show deference, often with a request)

This is more formal and is used when addressing someone older, in a higher position, or in a position of authority (e.g., teachers, bosses, elders). It’s often paired with a noun or verb to indicate what you’re asking for.

• xin
  • - Xin phép anh cho tôi vào. "Please allow me to enter."
  • - Xin chị giúp tôi một việc. "Please help me with something, ma’am."
  • - Xin thầy cho em mượn sách. "Please lend me the book, teacher."

3. vui lòng (for written requests or formal notices)

This is the most formal and is typically used in signs, written instructions, or when addressing a group (e.g., customers, employees). It sounds more official and less personal.

• vui lòng
  • - Vui lòng giữ im lặng. "Please keep quiet."
  • - Vui lòng điền vào mẫu đơn này. "Please fill out this form."
  • - Vui lòng không hút thuốc. "Please do not smoke."

4. cho tôi... (thêm) (casual but polite, for friends or peers)

For friends or people younger than you, Vietnamese often omits "please" entirely and instead phrases the request directly with a polite tone. Adding thêm (more) or một chút (a little) softens the request.

• cho tôi... (thêm/một chút)
  • - Cho tôi thêm chút nước. "Please give me a little more water."
  • - Cho tôi xem thử nhé. "Let me see, please."
  • - Cho tôi mượn quyển sách này. "Please lend me this book."

Quick Cheat Sheet

👉 Most useful for daily life: Start by memorizing làm ơn for most situations. Pair it with a direct request (e.g., Làm ơn cho tôi...) to sound natural and polite. For elders or bosses, use xin to show respect. Avoid overusing "please" in casual settings—Vietnamese often implies politeness through tone and context instead.