居留守をつかう

いるすをつかう◆idiom
pretend to be absent

彼は電話に出ないで、居留守をつかっている。

He’s pretending not to be home when the phone rings.

◆ What It Really Means
to avoid social interaction by pretending not to be home or available
Literal Meaning
to use one's presence to feign absence
Literal Breakdown
居being present at a location+留守being away or absent+をつかうto employ a method
◇ Mental Image
The mental picture is someone sitting quietly at home while pretending to be elsewhere, avoiding detection.
◈ When to Use
A neighbor unexpectedly visits, but you’re avoiding them. You stay silent and motionless inside, hoping they’ll think no one’s home.
◉ Cultural Note
This idiom reflects traditional Japanese social norms valuing indirect communication and avoiding direct confrontation. It’s a culturally accepted way to politely decline interaction without explicit refusal.
informal

to pretend not to be home or available when someone visits or calls, often to avoid social interaction

母は来客があったのに、居留守をつかって出なかった。

Even though we had visitors, Mom pretended not to be home.

彼は忙しいと言っておきながら、実は居留守をつかっていた。

He said he was busy, but he was actually just avoiding us.

Commonly used in domestic contexts to describe avoiding face-to-face interactions.

Collocations

居留守をつかう人someone who pretends not to be home居留守を使うto use the 'pretend absent' tactic

Related Phrases

居留守を決め込むidiom
to decisively pretend to be absent

Pro Tip

Avoiding social interactions

居留守をつかう is often used when you want to avoid a visitor or caller without outright refusal. It’s softer than saying 'I don’t want to see you.'

Gold Rule

Context matters

Use 居留守をつかう for social avoidance in personal settings. It’s not appropriate for professional or formal contexts.

Word Origin

居留守 combines 居る (iru, 'to be present') and 留守 (rusui, 'absence'). The compound emerged in the Edo period as a euphemism for avoiding contact by feigning absence.

Usage Notes

Often used humorously or critically. The phrase implies a deliberate choice to avoid someone rather than genuine absence.

Word Breakdown

居
to be present
root
+
留守
absence
noun
+
をつかう
to use (a tactic)
verb phrase
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